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We Speak to Pitbull | Jufl

We Speak to Pitbull | Jufl

[fusion_text]ON THE COUCH WITH PITBULL

The man, the myth, the legend. He’s been flying the flag for the bald latino 30-somethings of pop music for what feels like an eternity, prompting many to wonder ‘when it will all come to an end?’. Let’s hope it’s soon. I sat down for a chat with Mr. 305 and his translator, who assisted me with every second response seeing as ‘Mr. Worldwide’ now subconsciously rotates his speech to Spanish every 20 seconds or 6 “dalê”s (whichever comes first). Learn a few things as we speak to Pitbull.[/fusion_text][fusion_text]His fashion inspiration came from watching the first two seasons of ‘Australian Idol’.

Every pop star has something iconic about their look, and for Pitbull it’s what puts him head and shoulders above the rest of the men his age dirty dancing with girls young enough to be their children. Worldwide dedicates his early musical success to his visual emulation of Shannon Noll and the BMW salesman swag of Anthony Callea, remarking “I used to think my facial hair was too greasy, but after seeing Noll perform ‘What About Me’ with his soul patch bumping up and down, I realised the secret was to just give it everything with the hair product on my goatee and shave the rest clean off. I’ve never looked back or into a mirror since.”[/fusion_text][fullwidth background_color=”” background_image=”” background_parallax=”none” enable_mobile=”no” parallax_speed=”0.3″ background_repeat=”no-repeat” background_position=”left top” video_url=”” video_aspect_ratio=”16:9″ video_webm=”” video_mp4=”” video_ogv=”” video_preview_image=”” overlay_color=”” overlay_opacity=”0.5″ video_mute=”yes” video_loop=”yes” fade=”no” border_size=”0px” border_color=”” border_style=”” padding_top=”20″ padding_bottom=”20″ padding_left=”0″ padding_right=”0″ hundred_percent=”no” equal_height_columns=”no” hide_on_mobile=”no” menu_anchor=”” class=”” id=””][one_half last=”no” spacing=”yes” center_content=”no” hide_on_mobile=”no” background_color=”” background_image=”” background_repeat=”no-repeat” background_position=”left top” border_size=”0px” border_color=”” border_style=”” padding=”” margin_top=”” margin_bottom=”” animation_type=”” animation_direction=”” animation_speed=”0.1″ class=”” id=””][imageframe lightbox=”no” lightbox_image=”” style_type=”none” bordercolor=”” bordersize=”0px” borderradius=”0″ stylecolor=”” align=”center” link=”” linktarget=”_self” animation_type=”0″ animation_direction=”down” animation_speed=”0.1″ hide_on_mobile=”no” class=”” id=””] [/imageframe][/one_half][one_half last=”yes” spacing=”yes” center_content=”no” hide_on_mobile=”no” background_color=”” background_image=”” background_repeat=”no-repeat” background_position=”left top” border_size=”0px” border_color=”” border_style=”” padding=”” margin_top=”” margin_bottom=”” animation_type=”” animation_direction=”” animation_speed=”0.1″ class=”” id=””][imageframe lightbox=”no” lightbox_image=”” style_type=”none” bordercolor=”” bordersize=”0px” borderradius=”0″ stylecolor=”” align=”center” link=”” linktarget=”_self” animation_type=”0″ animation_direction=”down” animation_speed=”0.1″ hide_on_mobile=”no” class=”” id=””] [/imageframe][/one_half][/fullwidth][fusion_text]He is considering changing his stage name to ‘Poodle’ after visiting Australia on his ‘Pitbull Live’ tour and being informed at Customs that due to tighter Australian pet ownership laws, Barnaby Joyce was now leading a violent campaign for him to be captured and put down.

Clearly still bearing the mental scars from this incident, Worldwide’s translator told me I was “barkin’ mad” and suggested I change the subject to another question. I had a dog years joke lined up for this one but we’ll move on.[/fusion_text][fusion_text]If you ask Siri ‘what is the best Pitbull song?’, your phone’s iTunes store will freeze and eventually quit as a safety feature to avoid ‘death by dalê’.

This one actually works, Apple really have stepped their game up recently. And I’m out of data.[/fusion_text][imageframe lightbox=”no” lightbox_image=”” style_type=”none” bordercolor=”” bordersize=”0px” borderradius=”0″ stylecolor=”” align=”center” link=”” linktarget=”_self” animation_type=”0″ animation_direction=”down” animation_speed=”0.1″ hide_on_mobile=”no” class=”” id=””] [/imageframe][separator style_type=”none” top_margin=”” bottom_margin=”30″ sep_color=”” border_size=”” icon=”” icon_circle=”” icon_circle_color=”” width=”” alignment=”center” class=”” id=””][fusion_text]

He was employed for an indeterminate period of time as Top Gear’s tame racing driver, ‘The Stig’. 

Pitbull reflected fondly on his time with the record-shattering motoring program Top Gear. “I was instructed to stay in character as The Stig at all times and not to talk, and received career-best reviews as a result – fans loved the change-up and my producer urged me to adopt this approach in my music.” He added that he was eventually let go for some ‘disagreements’ with staff, including refusing to remove his sunglasses from under his racing helmet before attempting timed laps, and a number of embarrassing incidences whereby he was caught determinedly humping the leg of guests with his tongue out. Sadly fame can be too much to handle for some.[/fusion_text][imageframe lightbox=”no” lightbox_image=”” style_type=”none” bordercolor=”” bordersize=”0px” borderradius=”0″ stylecolor=”” align=”center” link=”” linktarget=”_self” animation_type=”0″ animation_direction=”down” animation_speed=”0.1″ hide_on_mobile=”no” class=”” id=””] [/imageframe][separator style_type=”none” top_margin=”” bottom_margin=”30″ sep_color=”” border_size=”” icon=”” icon_circle=”” icon_circle_color=”” width=”” alignment=”center” class=”” id=””][fusion_text]He and Jason Derulo are now legally required to drop their name at the start of every track they release to allow people time to change the radio station before the song starts or cover their children’s ears.

Despite all the evidence to the contrary, it seems politicians in America can still get the important stuff done.

Leo Hurley

@___leohurley[/fusion_text]

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